The Frantic Quest For Peace
Frantic is not exactly the word that comes to mind when one thinks of peace. I use that term a bit tongue in cheek, but it helps to illustrate how important it is to come to a place of peace no matter what kind of Beast you are dealing with. The world will tell you that you have no right to feel peace in the midst of your own storm. Do not listen to the world. Your Beast will try to convince you that as a parent, you have no right to be at peace when your child is headed for disaster. Turn a deaf ear to the Beast. Your Beast will tempt you to stay on guard; he will reason with you that you cannot afford to be peaceful. Turn away from your Beast. You have every right to be at peace, no matter what. The good news is that God offers you the free gift of peace; the kind that surpasses all understanding. The bad news is that most of us are not that great at receiving the gift.
I came to the sad realization that having a drug addicted child could mean that the storm would never cease. Although I never lost hope, the reality is that “this could be my life”; that my daughter may never beat her Beast in my lifetime. The cycle of hope and disappointment may never end. I knew that I had to find peace. It was up to me to find a way to have peace in the middle of the storm. I created this picture (my amazing artist drew it) to illustrate the kind of peace I am talking about; the kind that does not make sense considering the current circumstances.
Finding this kind of peace was hard work; hence the term – a frantic quest for peace. It required me to give up control, and to put my faith and trust in God.(ok, I still work on this every single day). Yeah, I know he is God and he knows stuff I don’t, but it is not easy to let go when you are living in paralyzing fear.
When all hell broke loose in my life, I hung on to control for dear life. My natural tendency to give up control to God and then snatch it back was magnified by a hundred. My frantic quest for peace ended up pretty miraculous considering the control freak that I had become. I am not at a place where I am sitting on that island, my feet in the sand and a smile on my face, while the sharks swarm around me. I still feel a raindrop or two. Every now and again the clouds darken my heart, but I am getting there. I hope that you do too.
Standing With You
Valerie Silveira is an award-winning author, international speaker and Beast slayer. Through the devastation of losing her daughter over and over to the addiction Beast, and finally losing her to a senseless murder, Valerie empowers others to stand up and fight for their lives. She is the creator of Nine Actions to Battle Your Beast and the Still Standing Sisterhood membership program. Valerie uses her books and Sisterhood to guide women in their quest for happiness, peace, and purpose. She builds up women of courage who stand strong against any Beast in their lives.
Until her death in August 2016, Valerie chose to call her daughter Jamie, “Jordan.”